Have I really grown up? Many changes and different experiences in my life over the past 2 years. Highs, lows, university, ktvs, kitchen, school again, girl who loved me the most, girl who I got into a proper relationship for once, 3rd parties, misunderstandings, difference, human touches, my own business. 

Compared to previously, I know I have changed. I have gained experiences and have different opinions in life now. Perhaps like how I rediscovered my passion.. things were always there, but I was always looking from another angle. 

My passion.. Was it just simply the love for music or food? Or just simply money? I realised that eventually, I love hanging out with friends. Everything I do, I was creating an excuse for a gathering with my friends. Ever since secondary school times.. I organized weekly soccer sessions. Was it simply just for the game? I guess I could safely conclude now that it was for the company. 

I mentioned sometime back that my life changes 3 times. 1st when I picked up soccer, 2nd when I picked up music, and 3rd when I picked up culinary officially. All for the same reason. In a way, I am proud of myself, that I have finally found out my main happiness in life. Eventually, I do want to have a cozy, comfortable, happy family. And to achieve that in my truly beloved Singapore, money is an important issue. I recall yun's mum conversation with her sis in their van some time back. Her sister was asking if her mum bought the blueberrys from ntuc because she loves them, and if she bought more if it was a promotion. Her mum answered that she did not look at the price when she bought them simply because for such a simple item her daughter asked for, what's there to be concerned about the price. Just buy. It's a simple vague conversation, but I took out quite a bit for it. Sometimes it is not about spoiling your kid.. it's the small things that people value in life. We're too busy and neglecting everything here.. 

My relationship with Yun was filled with quite a bit of arguments over conflict of ideologies and perpective in life. I guess I have taken some along with my even though we broke up. Such as not asking for a plastic bag when I do not need it. It was an experience that taught my many things I guess. Somehow, it was yj who I still feel I could relate to most easily. In a way, I do miss and think back on those times, but it is all simply memories. 

Kailian... I dunno how she is right now, but I do hope that she is living her life well. Come end of Oct 2012, we would have broken up for a year. 

In a way, I could see why my dear friend marcus is still with kelly. I am guessing it's like me. Looking for a partner who is truly independent, yet becomes a small girl sometimes when with me. Of course, compatible character and personality plays an important role as well.

I have been neglecting many friends over the past 1.5 years since I started school, and am meeting as many people as I can recently. I do miss my friends. I never believed that guys could either concentrate on their career, or their partners, and not both at the same time. I'm getting to believing it. Oh wells.. part of growing up. 

In a way, I am missing the one week stint in Thailand alone. Where I have no worries and just spend day by day as it is. Thai songs are my favourite now.. the chord progressions and the feelings in them. =)

I do feel that I have gained so so so so much these 2 years. Meeting so many people from so many different backgrounds and culture. 

6 more weeks to end of school, and 3 more weeks to end of apprenticeship. I cannot wait. It is a whole new year awaiting me. 

I do sincerely believe, that I have grown up, a substantial amount. 

And I still love yun. I long for a big big hug.